in the blink of an eye...

Wow, seems like I blinked and the weekend disappeared!

working all day saturday just seems to get harder and harder... it really eats into the desperately craved for 'homelife' time… and a lot of the evening is spent winding down from the day on desk... and saturday we were one short for the day - by late friday there was just no-one prepared to come in for the shift, so knowing we were going to be shortstaffed sailor lily provided a bottle of howling wolves vegan wine for us to share and help the winding-down process once we'd closed the library (thank you!!) - it wasn't as good as having another body on desk would have been, but at least we had something to look forward to after the hard slog... there were four of us to share the vino so we had a glass, a quick debrief and catch up and then went home - i got a lift so i was pretty much at home in the same time it would have taken waiting for public transport… maybe that's how the day should end every day - well, at least if you have to work at the weekend anyway?!! 

and what a wild and windy night it turned out to be – definitely a night to spend by the heater - but we lost power here in st kilda for a few hours - there went the heater – luckily i'd had dinner because once 'the lights went out' I couldn’t even have a cuppa because the flats are all electric – bummer – thank fuck for candles and laptop batteries – at least I could listen to music - when i could hear it over the storm that is - the whoosh of the wind was incredible!!!

my heart goes out to those in the rural areas where flooding has become a major disaster or where communities are living under threat... so many areas affected - i've lived in bushfire prone areas but never been close to a flood - i can only imagine the anguish, heartbreak and frustration of having to deal with the devastation so much water, mud, and debris would cause... and then there are the animals - voiceless victims of every disaster...

it caught my attention when i heard they were sandbagging in skipton - i once lived near there and seeing this map sent me tumbling down memory lane to 1989 when brann and i 'packed up the family' - the animals that shared our lives and whose lives we were fortunate to be part of - goats (3), dogs (4), cats (10) and numerous chooks (mostly progeny of those we'd saved from battery farms) - said goodbye to our 'shack' and 50 acres of bushland and granite outcrops high up a mountain in tallarook and moved to snake valley...

we lived in a small campervan for the first few months and the annexe became our kitchen... we had a small two-burner camping stove with gas bottle and the fridge was an esky replenished with ice every couple of days... the dunny was either a bucket, or a shovel and roll of toilet paper - now this wasn't too bad in the summer, but for the first few weeks we were there it bucketed down - luckily it was september (and an unseasonal amount of rain) but at least it wasn't bitterly cold too!!!!

once the weather 'fined up' we had a dam dug, and then a western red cedar house built to lock-up... it was only 10 squares - but it was big enough for us to start with - we had 20 acres of beautiful australian bushland to supplement our space and add to our enjoyment... and the house was 500 metres from the front gate - blissful seclusion...

we moved in to the empty shell and started the hard work of doing all the internal stuff ourselves - walls, ceiling, fit-out etc... we put in a large water tank and a gravity feed tank on the roof, had a septic tank installed, fitted a slow-combustion stove in the kitchen and a wood heater in the lounge - we had plenty of old fallen trees on our bush block - we just had to do the sawing and chopping! - and finally we could afford a small solar and battery setup... up til now we'd been living with a generator, 12-volt battery power and candles (mains power was way too expensive to get connected!) but we were forever having to get the racv out to charge up our car batteries!!!!

we added a wide verandah - this was the view from it before we started landscaping (that's caspar wandering around in the yard - his sister suli was probably off being wicked somewhere - we had a 1/2 acre fenced off around the house - plenty of space for everyone to entertain themselves) - it was a wonderful place to watch the resident wallabies, kangaroos and kookaburras - we had a regular visiting fox that came right up to the fence and teased and harassed the dogs terribly once it realised they couldn't get out!!! and there was also a koala (we called him kelly) who took up residence at certain times of the year...

this was home - my country dream - by this time it was 1992 - we'd had our ups and downs over the years but hey, we were still together after 17 years so there was no reason to believe that we weren't going to be here forever - we were even trying to conceive... but then one fateful phone call became the catalyst in turning our lives upside down, and our world started to implode...

in the blink of an eye...


you may notice i don't use photos with brann in them - i have many photographic memories of him but since we split up i don't know that i have the right to 'share them with the world' without his knowledge or approval so consequently i keep those to myself...

enough of memory lane - it's hard to keep the tears at bay - so i'll leave you with janis and a song called 'little girl blue'...

writing about womyn....

i was lucky enough to 'win' a pass (compliments of work) to a session at the melbourne writer's festival happening at the moment... we were to choose three sessions with the outcome being we would get into one of the choices...

what a treat... i handed in my three preferences and waited to see which one i was going to - hey, i really didn't care which one i was booked in for - there's a wealth of talent out there and all would have at least been interesting!!!

i ended up going along to the "writing women" session on friday where carmel bird and sally muirden spoke about their latest novels...

now i have to admit here to not having read anything from either of these authors so i was looking forward to hearing both of them speak to discover what i'd been missing all of this time...

both are considered 'historical writers' and this session was to hear them discuss "the pull of old europe, and writing about motherhood and mysticism." (sounds like herstory rather than history to me!!!)

they both spoke eloquently about their writing and inspiration for subject matter and gave short readings from their books... both of which i might be inclined to read now out of curiosity!!!


so, not having read the books the only 'offerings' here are reviews from the reading's website...

a woman of seville by sally muirden...

"Seville in the year 1616 is a place of betrayal and torture, with the spying eyes of the Inquisition everywhere. Moorish settlers are banished from Spain and their traumatised children are locked away in monasteries for religious conversion with even the most penitent locals conducting their true lives in secret. Paula Sanchez is a concubine famed for her beauty who does her best to avoid the attentions of her lecherous benefactor Bishop Rizi in order to sit as Mary for the ‘The Penitent Magdalen’. In the evenings she escapes the heat and uncertainty of her earthy existence and conflicting morality with the Ladder Man: a mute, almost-ethereal being who never sets foot upon the ground, preferring instead the rooftops of Seville. Young apprentice painter Diego Velasquez wanders freely about the city and watches over the progress of the painting and Paula’s involvement within it."

child of the twilight by carmel bird...

"′It is strange and fascinating to me to think of people -- Avila in particular -- praying me into existence.′

Sydney Peony Kent is nineteen years old. She was a longed-for IVF baby, ′product of an unknown egg and unknown sperm′ implanted in her mother, Avila. Avila not only used the latest scientific techniques to conceive Sydney, but also prayed to the Bambinello, a small carved and jewelled statue of the infant Jesus housed in the church of Santa Maria in Aracoeli in Rome and said to have miraculous properties.

Avila′s distant relative Father Roland Bruccoli was conceived in a more conventional manner, but his mother too prayed to the Bambinello before his birth -- and that of his twin sister Eleena. It is when the adult Roland is visiting the church of Santa Maria one evening that the Bambinello is stolen. Roland hopes that Father Cosimo, an archivist, poet and riddler said to speak in the ancient green language of the troubadours, can assist in discovering what has happened to the Bambinello. But when matters of belief are involved, nothing is straightforward, as Sydney discovers herself when she too becomes caught up in tracing the Bambinello′s fate.

Deftly weaving together religion, science, pregnancies wanted and unwanted, love, loss and belief, Carmel Bird has created a luminous novel that both questions and celebrates the miraculous."


i enjoyed both authors 'talks' but was more drawn to carmel bird's view on womyn and her sense of humour - especially when she spoke about the 'evolution' of the title of her book and the control the publishers have - originally she wanted to call it "child of the twilight of time" but no - that would be too long... another option was "the green language" but no - people wouldn't understand that (and i have to profess that here was the expectation that you'd either read the book or knew the reference, but as i hadn't and didn't i certainly 'looked it up' to discover the green language is also called the language of the birds or the language of the gods - hrrmph, publishers don't give the reading public credit for being able to research to find answers!)... in the end it was settled on a 'watered-down' version of her original title and became "child of the twilight"...


it was a bit of a disappointment that the session only went for just over an hour, so with introductions and readings there wasn't much time left for 'intimate dialogue' with the authors - and unfortunately the 'facilitator' was a bit 'blehhh' - i can't remember her name (perhaps because she was unmemorable) - what i do remember was that she was a readings representative (surprise, surprise)...


and, on that note, i've got things to do - got the brother coming around and we're going to visit the mother so best i get my shit together...

and life goes on...

well i wasn't able to stave off the 'lurgy' that's been doing the rounds at work (thanks to poorly people who come to work in the mistaken belief they're no longer contagious - you know who you are!!?!!)... i've been unwell the last couple of days but felt a tad less miserable this morning - luckily, because there was to be no snuggling into a warm bed today - the old girl had wee'd in her sleep so she was damp (but oblivious), i was damp (and very aware of it - the warm stream woke me up), and the bedding was wet and needed to be changed... i should have put her out at 5am when i let the boy out - but she looked so cute, cosy, cuddly and dead to the world!!

now i'd been 'encouraged' to get up, what was i to do but get myself a cuppa and turn on the telly (it was 6.30 sunday morning) - i didn’t watch any of the ‘election day coverage’ yesterday or last night  – like a lot of people i’m over politicians, political speak, grand-standing, empty promises and the blah, blah, blah - but i was somewhat surprised to discover australia had a ‘hung parliament’ – the first in 70 years…

so with no outright winner it appears we have a caretaker government with neither party able to govern in their own right… so now julia and tony have to play the 'i'll scratch your back if you scratch mine' game in order to woo the independents (all right wing apart from the greens - not looking good for labor!!)

the greens made up ground as a viable major party threat, winning their first lower house seat in the electorate of melbourne (previously held by labor for 106 years) and who knows - perhaps the balance of power?

wyatt roy seems set to become the youngest ever member of parliament by taking the seat of longman – not only does young wyatt have a back to front name, this is the first time he's been able to vote in a federal election - he's 20 so was too young to vote in the 'kevin 07' election (ahh, those crazy queenslanders!!!)

of course there are losers, winners and blame aplenty - and the community will no doubt be subjected to watered down half promises and outright backflips - yep, that's politics!!! unfortunately there's no end to the politicking yet folks!!

yawn & sigh…

what i did do last night though was watch a really interesting movie – disgrace – based on a novel by j m coetzee – jon malkovich plays david lurie, a middle-aged academic in post-apartheid south Africa – it explores racial tension, sexual abuse and power, the search for identity, father-daughter relationships (jessica haines plays his daughter lucy) and touches on animal rights… it was thought-provoking and confronting...

and now i can feel the pull of domesticity - towels and bedding won't wash themselves... neither will the dishes, nor will the vaccuuming get done if i don't get up and do it...

ah yes, life does indeed go on…

changing the world - one small step at a time...

you know, as a palestinian sympathiser / supporter I never thought I’d have reason to say “go israel”!!!! unfortunately for the palestinian people it’s not in relation to their struggle or plight – but fortunately for animals israel may be proving itself to be a leading voice against the brutal fur trade…

according to unleashed australia “israel is on the verge of becoming the first country to completely ban fur. on 2nd september israel will vote on whether to ban the production, import and export of fur.”

sickeningly the 'price of fashion' for humans is paid by non-human animals - did you know millions of minks, raccoons, foxes, rabbits, dogs, cats and other animals are skinned alive, anally electrocuted, poisoned, beaten to death or drowned for their fur?!

how many animals are horrifically slain for one fur coat?

disturbing isn't it!!! why not add your voice and urge israel to 'help make fur history'?  change has to start somewhere - and hopefully spread rapidly...

concerned people do have a voice by way of petitions and protests - as evidenced in Catalonia on 28th July, when it became the first major region in mainland Spain to ban bullfighting!!!! yay for caring, compassionate people!!!!

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world.

Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” ... Margaret Mead

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on an up note for me and my weekend... i had the 'malmsbury mob' come to visit so i got to see my wee loudie-dude, irene and the rest of the gang... we walked, talked, ate and mellowed out with a relaxing smoke... it's always a lovely time when the 'country clan' comes down...

the following photo shows me, louie (it's a pity you can't see the detail in his little black face - it's very expressive) and the grey boy is old man lucky... mind you, there was a bit of a power struggle / territorial dispute going on - my lap was the desired prize and both were vying for more of it - looks like louie had the 'upper paw' when the photo was taken - he's spread out more!!!!

alas, that's it for now - it's time to do some 'domestics'...

a beautiful friendship...

my friend irene just sent me this video - it's grouse so i just had to share it... heartwarming, inspiring, beautiful - i shed a tear of happiness, amazement, wonder and sadness...